Camping trip

Anyone who knows me knows that camping is not high up on my priority list. In fact, it ranks nowhere near the top 50 on my list of priorities. I do, however, love to be out on the water and to spend time with my group of friends. These two things are what motivated me to go on my first float trip with Stacy and his group of friends. I was told that we would be camping on Friday and Saturday night and that we would be out on the river all day on Saturday for our canoe trip.

First, let's define camping. The dictionary defines camping as the act of encamping and living in tents in a camp. I obviously should have looked this up prior to our trip because my definition of camping or roughing it is living in a cabin or camper (or even in a tent as long as there is a shower house and toilets with running water). I had asked about the availability of running water and was given very vague answers. After my inquiry, I assumed (we all know what that does to a person) that running water would be available. We packed all of our gear (including Stacy's tent, food for grilling out, food to take on the river, and WAYYYY too much beer and alcohol), got in the car and headed to Arkansas. We started the trip with Stacy driving and me giving him the directions that I had gotten from Stacy-girl. I don't know if that was mistake number one or two, but somehow, we ended up in no-man's land somewhere in the hills of Arkansas nowhere near the Buffalo river. After stopping off at Bubba's bait shop and grocery store to ask for directions, we bought a map and finally found our way with Stacy reading the directions and me driving. (It runs in my family to be directionally-challenged and I didn't get it as bad as some other, un-named family members) I could have read the map and eventually gotten us there, but in order for a map to work, you must first have some idea of where you are, but I digress. We arrived at the campsite (finally) and I quickly realized that my dream of running water and a shower house was exactly that--a dream. I did have running water--it was just in the form of the river a hop, skip and a jump away. I used the restroom at a very smelly outhouse and wondered how I was going to shower after the canoe trip.

The next morning, we got up bright and early and headed to the canoe-rental place and got our boat. We loaded up at the drop-off zone and got on the river. It was at this point that Stacy had beer number one. (We differ on our opinions of float trips--he calls it a float trip because he says you are supposed to float down the river, have some beers and eventually make it to the pick up zone. I call it a canoe trip because apparently, I have a slightly competitive streak that drives me to want to catch up with all of the people who have somehow gotten ahead of us. The only way to accomplish this is to use that handy-dandy little tool they give you for such situations called a paddle.) We were going to go on the longer 10 mile trip, but the guides told us we should take the 6 mile trip since they had been experiencing a drought and the river was very low and should we take the longer trip, we would spend a lot of time pushing the canoe. So, we took the shorter trip. Everyone in the group was getting situated and having their beers (I personally would prefer to not drink a lot on the float trip since I like to enjoy the water and the beautiful trees (which I don't get nearly enough of in Kansas) and I don't like beer!) Once we really got going, I think Stacy was on beer number two. Shortly after that, we got stuck for the first time in the shallows. Poor Stacy got out of the canoe to push us out and jump back in the canoe. When he jumped back in, one foot made it into the canoe and the other slipped on the rocks. Needless to say, he wound up straddling the edge of the canoe (for all of you men out there, I am sorry that I had to describe this horrible agony to you.) When this happened, it also tipped the canoe, dumping out all of the contents including the cooler (with all of the beer) and you guessed it...me. There I was dripping wet, a little cold, and I absolutely couldn't be mad at Stacy since he was in so much pain (this time!) We reloaded everything, laid out towels across the canoe to dry and got back on our way.

The trip was going very well, everyone was having a good time, and we decided to stop for lunch. At this point, I think I realized that Stacy was several beers and a little whiskey into the trip and not feeling any pain. (Not that he was the only one). We got back in the boat and two tip-overs later, I was really getting tired of getting dumped out of that stupid boat. I think it was at this point that I started yelling at Stacy to stop leaning so much because he was going to tip us over again. I also told him that he was officially cut off from drinking any more whiskey. It was this point, he felt it necessary to inform every random stranger that we passed (yes I did have him actually paddling a little at this point) that I was mad at him and that he couldn't drink any more. Anyone who knows me knows that this really chafed me. We were getting close to the end of the trip when we were going into some perfectly calm water (not a single rapid anywhere in sight) when i felt the canoe leaning dangerously to the right. "Stacy stop leaning" came out of my mouth right before Stacy and the canoe dumped me unceremoniously into water approximately 3 feet deep. I scraped my hand, my leg and more importantly, my ego. I was fuming.

I think Stacy's friends (and mine now) were a combination of scared for Stacy and laughing at me and a little nervous as I proceeded to throw everything that used to be in our canoe (including the cooler) onto the shore. There were a couple of life jackets, two paddles, our trash bag, all of our soaking wet towels, and a big cooler. Stacy laid in the water watching the canoe fill up with water and laughed at me. Then, he wouldn't get up to help get the canoe back on top of the water. (He could do it himself he told me.) Fine, suit yourself!!!!!! I watched him slip and slide and take three attempts to get it uprighted. That was it, nothing but water for you from here on out!! Well, the temper tantrum ended (on my part) and Stacy sobered up a little after we got back to the campsite. We ended up having a great time and have gone on three canoe trips total.

We did solve the problem of how to handle the canoe trip. I would endure the lack of running water to be with our friends as long as I could have a luxury bath as soon as we got home. The next year, Kacie and I had our own canoe with Levi-Wilbur and Stacy and his cousin Mark (Kacie's husband) shared a canoe and proceeded to set a canoe-trip tipover record! The year after that, I got a few drinks early on, we tied all of the canoes together (five total, the water was actually high enough to do this that year) and I was one of the paddlers on one side and my sister Jennifer was on the other side. Apparently, the high-energy need to paddle runs in the family. We are looking forward to many more canoe trips with our friends. It's all about compromise, right???